In my last post I talked about the family calendar I worked for months on. I was excited to be taking it to the printer. I got a flash drive and thought I got it all on there, but, no such luck. Even more unfortunate, my computer died. Now I am computerless and having withdrawals. Thanks be to God for libraries.
On a positive note, I am hoping to start pursuing a part time job soon. Oh to be productive again. Without old Maxwell my computer, I am bored out of my gourd.
Green Pastures
Friday, December 16, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Family Calendar
For months I have worked on making a family calendar. Now I've got the following year's almost done. Here is a beautiful photo my son Scott took and I am making it a Christmas theme for the calendar.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Zoo Tales
Okay, I heard one more story. I'll tell you the story then call it a day.
Joe knows nothing about animals, but what the hey, it's a job.
"Oh, what is it," asked Joe.
"Well, we recently lost our Gorilla and he was our most popular exhibit. We are looking for someone to don a Gorilla suit and play Gorilla all day. The pay is good and it's a fun job."
A man is down on his luck, big time. He lost his job, ran out of unemployment, and just can't seem to get a break. A friend comes by and says, "Joe, I saw there is some sort of job opening at the zoo. Why don't you check it out."
Joe knows nothing about animals, but what the hey, it's a job.
During the interview, the zoo director says, "I'm sorry, that position has been filled, but I do have one more I think you might be perfect for."
"Oh, what is it," asked Joe.
"Well, we recently lost our Gorilla and he was our most popular exhibit. We are looking for someone to don a Gorilla suit and play Gorilla all day. The pay is good and it's a fun job."
"Well, I guess I could, sure."
The next morning Joe puts on the Gorilla suit and makes a few Gorilla noises, postures a bit, and swings from some vines. Each day he gets more rambunctious. The zoo has never seen such crowds around one exhibit. One day, Joe gets so carried away swinging on the vines that he flies right out of his area into the lion exhibit next door. The lion looks at him menacingly and begins to stalk him with an evil eye. Joe is scared spitless and backs away from the lion. Suddenly, the lion roars at Joe ferociously. Joe screams "Oh my God, help me, help me." The lion gets up close and mumbles in his ear, "Shut up stupid, or you'll get us both fired."
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| Shut up stupid or you'll get us both fired |
Time Flies, but You're Never Too Old
I am looking at the calendar and seeing that it is the end of November. I don't remember agreeing to time flying so quickly. But, as I am a sheep, and He is the Shepherd, I guess He doesn't need my okay. Best make the best out of every day. I had a day with opportunities to be a light to others and I did.
On another note, I heard a story about an elderly couple who were engaged to married. Want to hear it? I thought so:
A 92 year old man named Jake has fallen in love with Bessie, who is 89 years young. He proposes and she accepts. This is the first time for both so they are very excited. One day Jake and Bessie visit their local pharmacy. Jake found the owner of the establishment and said "Sir, do you sell heart medication here?"
"Why, yes we do," said the owner.
"How about Arthritis and Alzheimer's medication?"
"Yes, we sell that too."
"And what about medicine for Parkinson's, and hemorrhoids, and high blood pressure?"
"Of course."
"Good. And how about wheelchairs, canes, walkers and reading glasses?"
"Sir, we sell all of those things and more."
"Good," said Jake. "Cause Bessie and I are getting married soon and we want to register here for our wedding gifts."
On another note, I heard a story about an elderly couple who were engaged to married. Want to hear it? I thought so:
A 92 year old man named Jake has fallen in love with Bessie, who is 89 years young. He proposes and she accepts. This is the first time for both so they are very excited. One day Jake and Bessie visit their local pharmacy. Jake found the owner of the establishment and said "Sir, do you sell heart medication here?"
"Why, yes we do," said the owner.
"How about Arthritis and Alzheimer's medication?"
"Yes, we sell that too."
"And what about medicine for Parkinson's, and hemorrhoids, and high blood pressure?"
"Of course."
"Good. And how about wheelchairs, canes, walkers and reading glasses?"
"Sir, we sell all of those things and more."
"Good," said Jake. "Cause Bessie and I are getting married soon and we want to register here for our wedding gifts."
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Suite 101 loved my article on Bible idioms so much they made it a feature article under the protestant category and asked me to do a series.
1. Bible Idioms Relate to Culture of the Day
2. Puzzling and Misunderstood Idioms in the Bible
3. Idiomatic Terms Jesus Used Against the Religious Leaders
1. Bible Idioms Relate to Culture of the Day
2. Puzzling and Misunderstood Idioms in the Bible
3. Idiomatic Terms Jesus Used Against the Religious Leaders
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Pretty is as pretty does
Went to a banquet last night. People really dress up. I had the clothes, but I am pitiful when it comes to hair and make up. So my dear friend Peggy got out the old cosmetics and the hair this and the hair that and did a miracle. I got some comments. So, I am trying not to think, Man, do I look really bad all the time for it to make such a difference? No, I don't think I'll go there.
Menu was seasoned tri-tip, rosmeary over roasted potatoes, and ceasar salad with bits of salmon. I hope it's on the Lords banqueting table. Ymmm.
Menu was seasoned tri-tip, rosmeary over roasted potatoes, and ceasar salad with bits of salmon. I hope it's on the Lords banqueting table. Ymmm.
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